Looking back to how your parents prepared you for adult life. What are the things you’d want to do better or different, for your teenagers? Think about that for a minute…mmm.
Now, each teenager is unique and special, some of the time fearless and keen on adventuring through life. Others may bury themselves in their books and avoid social interaction. Some may drive their parents crazy. But at the end of the day, ALL teenagers push the boundaries of their parents no matter who they are.
In the mix of daily routines and activities parents easily switch over to autopilot to manage the chaos of the day, just to get through it all. But what if parents could use their discipline as a means to prepare their teenagers for adulthood? Teaching them how to become independent, emotionally stable and ready for life after University. Think about how that would make a difference to your family life.
What are the areas you wish to guide and support your teenager with? Areas such as transparency, budgets, social media influence, manners, professionalism, stress, confidence, relationships and self-esteem. These are the main areas which teenagers lack maturity. When they make decisions as an adult, they need to know what the consequences of their actions look like, preferably beforehand.
Do you want to be a parent that prepares their teenager for the real world, a parent who teaches them the skills they need to be happy as well as successful?
For example, teenager girls do not know how to value themselves within romantic relationships, young boys don’t know how to honor their girlfriends well. Some young teenagers might not have the confidence to go for an interview, or even believe in themselves that they are capable of doing a good job. Managing stress and their finances. Will you prepare them, or will they have to figure it out the hard way?
So how does a parent then incorporate adult preparation into their discipline/teaching routine?
From the age of 16 years, a teenager is capable of getting a part-time weekend job to earn some ‘pocket money’. Use this opportunity to teach them by giving them something to pay for. For example, their data or cell phone minutes. Show them how to use a simple monthly budget. Including a savings plan, monthly expenses, and unforeseen expenses. This allows the teenager to learn how to budget as well as save for a special occasion. As time goes on, ask your teenager to start paying for other things like, something towards the groceries, bus fare or rent.
What about personal development goals? What do they want to study? Where and how do they want to live? Will they share an apartment with a roommate or live alone? Do they need a car, or will they use public transport? Teach your teenagers how to look into the future and see what they might want to accomplish, and then put toward a goals list. Help them set out clear objectives in order to achieve those goals. Incorporate these objectives into their daily/weekly routines. Keeping them out of troubles way. Set up a rewards programme for each accomplishment, something that will motivate them.
Let’s go into self-esteem, will your teenager be prepared for rejection? Failure in the workplace? Teach your teenager positive self-esteem skills so that no matter what happens or how they may feel that they always bounce back and stand up again. Ask them to create a self-values list of all their characteristics they feel are positive, you can use this as a reassurance tool. Teach them how to recognise the truth form the lies, because we all know how lies are easily used to manipulate or intimidate young adults in the real world.
Things like how to handle stress or toxic relationships, how to have a positive self-dialog, how to find balance between social expectations and family time, how to maintain good health and the importance of cleanliness, how to dress appropriately so that others take them seriously, to how manage emotional responsibilities, how to create a happy and satisfied life.
It’s absolutely normal to feel overwhelmed as a parent with teenagers, there is so much to juggle and get ‘right’. What if you could hire an expert in the field so that you could teach your teenagers the skills, you’d like them to be equipped with? Sounds great right?
By hiring The RedThinking Life Coach, you could do just that, a coach that would teach your teenagers these vital skills. Someone to give you support and guidance to manage through these turbulent years. Visit us at www.redthinking.co.za to book your free 30 minute consultation.